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 Communication Made Easy for Men
Andrew wishes that there was a guidebook listing the rules for how to talk with a woman...and he's only half-way joking about that!
It seems to Andrew that he's always saying the wrong thing to his girlfriend Liz-- or he's not saying the right thing at the right time.
It's frustrating and confusing to Andrew. He just wants Liz to be happy and for them to enjoy one another. He also would like this to happen without so much drama and hassle!
If you're a man who is looking for relationship communication tips, look no further.
Unfortunately, there is no guidebook filled with rules that will guarantee that you and your woman will never argue, be tense with one another or disconnected.
Every relationship is different and the dynamics between every man and woman vary widely.
However, there are some common mistakes that men tend to make that can be avoided and changed.
Of course, women also make communication mistakes. But, if you are a man who would like your love relationship or marriage to be as close and passionate as it can be, you need to focus in on how you are talking and listening with your woman.
One mistake that often happens in relationships is that a man will assume he knows what his partner wants (or needs) to hear.
Do you want communication between you and your woman to be easier? If so, stop making assumptions!
Don't assume that she doesn't want to know what you're thinking about or how you really feel.
One common complaint that women make of their men is that they're not open enough. (Yes, there are exceptions to this.)
If you are hesitant to let your partner know that you feel down about something, conflicted, angry, or otherwise upset, she will probably sense that something is off with you anyway.
Perhaps you don't want to trouble her or you don't want to "go there" with your woman. You might even be a little embarrassed to be feeling the way that you do.
I encourage you to honor how you feel and also where you are-- don't force yourself to talk about it. At the same time, give your partner some information. Let her know that you are processing some difficult stuff and that you'll share about when you feel like you can.
Then, be sure to follow through and actually tell her what's going on for you when you're ready.
Don't assume that you know best.
Another communication misstep that many men make is to try to take control and fix it for their woman. I understand. You care about this person and you don't want to see her in pain or struggling.
Don't add to her challenges by claiming to have "the" answer to her troubles. While your idea for how to resolve whatever is bothering her may be valid and useful, if she wants your support, not problem-solving, you are only creating distance between you two.
When your woman opens up to you about a situation that's going on for her, remind yourself to ask her how she wants to be supported right now. You can ask her to be specific.
Is she open to your ideas? Does she want to be held and hugged? Would she like you to just listen and let her get it out?
Find out what she wants from this conversation and respect that.
About the Author
Get Otto Collins' FREE report: "10 Biggest Relationship and Passion-Killing Mistakes Men Make (and What To Do About It.)" when you sign up for his "Light Her Up" relationship advice newsletter for men at LightHerUp.com (ArticlesBase SC #2835709)
Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/ - Communication Made Easy for Men
Written by Susie and Otto Collins | 7/15/2010
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