Sharing the Full Story
6/9/2010
If we leave our friends out of our process when the going gets tough, our friendships can begin to feel shallow.
When we are going through a difficult time, we may hesitate to call
even our best friends because we don't want to burden them with our
troubles. This can be especially true if we've been going through a
series of challenges, and we're starting to feel as if we sound like a
broken record. It is important to remember that at times like these our
friends sincerely want to be there for us whenever they can. We can
always check with them to make sure it's a good time for them before we
start talking, and if it's not a good time, we can call back at another
time, or call another friend.
We know for ourselves that when we have a good friend, we don’t want
them to suffer alone when we are just a phone call away. We want them
to call us and share their sorrows with us, as well as their joys,
because this is what sharing a life through friendship is about. It is
at our lowest points that we really need to rely on our friends without
worrying that we are a burden. If you are feeling self-conscious about
having a tough time, you can bring this fact into the conversation by
acknowledging it. Chances are your friend will reassure you that she is
happy to be there for you. In fact, rather than feeling taxed, most of
us feel better when we have helped a friend simply by listening
empathically while they share their feelings.
Without our friends, we would be hard pressed to get through the tough
times and celebrate the good ones. If we leave our friends out of our
process when the going gets tough, our friendships can begin to feel
shallow. On the other hand, when we include our friends in the full
story of our life—the good, the bad, and the ugly—we build authentic
relationships in which we can be who we truly are. When we do this, we
invite our friends to bring their whole selves to the relationship as
well.
By Madisyn Taylor
http://www.dailyom.com/articles/2010/25731.html
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